I Live by Compassion

Bro. Michael Sidarta Susilo

Whenever I reflect deeply on my life journey, I conclude that my life has become a reality because of the help of so many people. I realized that I had received more help from people than I had done good work for others. I was born into a simple family with poor economic conditions. My parents were not ready to form a family, so we repeatedly experienced poverty and financial difficulties. I experienced such conditions until I decided to apply to start my initial formation in 1991.

I have one older brother, two younger brothers, and one younger sister. I was born in Surakarta on 3 January 1971. A few months after my birth, our family moved to Lampung on the island of Sumatra. My life journey is very different from that of my five siblings.

Since the second grade of primary school, I have not lived with my parents. During primary school, I stayed with my grandparents in Salatiga. I lived with my father's eldest brother's family in Sragen, east of Surakarta, during junior high school. I returned to Salatiga during senior high school and lived with my father's younger sister. I did not live with my parents because of the prevailing poverty. Before starting my initial formation, my life depended mainly on the help and kindness of others.

I am grateful to God for the opportunity to join the FIC Congregation. Since the postulate, I have received a lot of help from my fellow brothers. My life history from childhood to adulthood showed that I was a person who lacked confidence, hesitated to do things, and often experienced unstable psychological and mental conditions. I am indebted to the brothers who handled me during my initial formation and for their intervention in my life. I have learnt a lot about my life as their intervention has enabled me to do self-management, enabling me to obtain healing independently.

After making my temporary profession, I was assigned to study nursing. The results of my studies could have been more satisfactory, but thank God the Congregation accepted me. Then, I was assigned to accompany the elderly brothers and brothers who were chronically ill. During this assignment, I received a lot of help from the Congregation. My work for the elderly and sick brothers was not much, but my encounter with them made me understand my life choices better as a religious brother. The elderly brothers helped me pay more attention to the spiritual dimension of my life. They taught me the values of simplicity, honesty, and commitment to my salvation. I undertook this task in Semarang for three years.

In 2005, I was assigned to study philosophy and theology in Yogyakarta, which I did for four years. Then, in July 2009, I accepted to be a novice master in Muntilan, an assignment I did for nine years until December 2018, when I was elected as Vicar to the Provincial Superior of Indonesia. In addition to these responsibilities, I was actively involved in various congregational activities, such as supporting the Provincial Council's commission and managing the magazine of the Indonesian Province. In my humble opinion, there is room for improvement in the quality of my work. At times, I feel I have not reached my full potential. Nevertheless, I am profoundly grateful for the understanding and support of the Congregation and my brothers in the Indonesian Province, whose kindness and assistance have greatly shaped my life.

As Vicar, I lived in the Provincial House in Semarang, and my daily tasks were in the Provincial office. I am still involved in many congregational activities in Indonesia. I am grateful that the people around me usually helped do the tasks given to me by the Congregation. This experience taught me to strengthen my life skills in working with others. At the same time, I must continue to train myself to humbly ask for help from those around me, especially my fellow brothers. The principle of life that I strive for is to honestly and courageously admit and accept my weaknesses and limitations.

My life journey resonates deeply with the message in Matthew's Gospel: "Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you." I strive to live within the Kingdom of God and its righteousness, as demonstrated by my efforts to honestly acknowledge and embrace my weaknesses and limitations, nurture a humble attitude toward learning, and seek help when necessary. Through these experiences, I have come to recognize God's unwavering guidance and support.

As I step into my new responsibilities as Vicar (member of the General Council), I am resolved not to add to the challenges or burdens faced by the community. I am keenly aware of my own shortcomings and unworthiness for this role. Yet, drawing strength from my life's journey, I trust that God, in His infinite faithfulness, will provide His helper to sustain and guide me in carrying out my duties faithfully.